Fanfic

Kristen Bealer

The Idiocy
5/04 Getting home is half the battle. Literally. A parody of Homer's "The Odyssey".
Country Wisdom
8/05 What really happened during Daria's original stay at Camp Grizzly? A fanfic based on comments and flashbacks from Camp Fear. A response to the Isa/Kristen write-off at the PPMB.
A Little Knowledge is a Dangerous Thing
8/05 Just another uneventful day at the LHS library. Aside from the ghost, that is. A response to the Isa/Kristen write-off at the PPMB.
The Life and Death of Stacy III
3/09
Stacy's true motives are at last revealed! Based on the famous opening monologue from William Shakespeare's "Richard III". A response to an Iron Chef issued by Richard Lobinske: Write the cast into one of Shakespeare's plays.
Card Games
3/09
Ten-year-old Daria has a brush with popularity because of...books?  A fanfic based on a photo from "Masochist's Memories" in the Daria Diaries: "I always got invited to slumber parties.  I was the only one with an adult library card."
Don't Sweat the Mall Stuff
8/09 Quinn and Sandi are at their worst while competing over prom dresses.  Stacy is at her best while working at a pet store.  Tiffany simply is.  Just another day at the mall, assuming everyone survives the experience.
Balletdictorian
12/09 Six-year-old Jodie Landon dreams of being the perfect ballerina, but life takes a few interesting turns along the way as she struggles to win her parents' support and attention.
Before the Deprogramming
5/10 Thirteen-year-old Jane Lane joins the Girl Scouts in an attempt to get out of baby-sitting. She finds it tougher than she expected as she struggles to survive a ruthless cookie sale competition, two hyperactive children, and ten thousand verses of "John Jacob Jingleheimer Schmidt."
Moving the Goalposts
10/10 Sandi Griffin has a serious problem with her best friend.  Set during the episode 'The Misery Chick.'
All Hallows' Peeved
11/10 It's Halloween! Young Daria goes trick-or-treating with Helen, Quinn agonizes over finding just the right costume, and Jake prepares to wage a one-man war against pranksters. A precanon fanficbased on a photograph in "The Daria Diaries."
For Better or For Worse, For Richer or For Poorer
4/11 Erin is sent to Switzerland when she files for divorce, but she finds the journey more painful than she expected.  A story that looks behind the scenes of the episode "Aunt Nauseam."
Quinn of Hearts
6/11 While Daria and Jane struggle to find a new after-school hangout, Quinn struggles with the frustratingly stupid Fashion Club and her own frustratingly intelligent brain while working on a school project.
Trix of the Trade
10/11 Daria struggles to prove that Quinn's imaginary friend doesn't exist...but the imaginary friend has other ideas.  Based on a comment in "Groped by an Angel."
A QB Grows in Lawndale
2/12 What would have happened if Kevin decided not to rejoin the football team at the end of "A Tree Grows in Lawndale"?  An AU story that follows the ex-QB through both victories and setbacks.
I'm Dreaming of a Trite Christmas
3/13 Helen and Jake decide to stay home for Christmas instead of visiting family, and plan to make it the best Christmas ever.  They, along with their four- and three-year-old daughters Daria and Quinn, find that the task is not as easy as they'd hoped.
Barch Nemesis
3/13 Jake encounters an unlikely kindred spirit.  A response to an Iron Chef issued by JoeMerl: Random Pairing Challenge!
Why?
4/13 Kevin seeks the answer to a vitally important question.
The Double-Crossed Girls
8/13 Val is coming to Lawndale to visit the winner of the "Spend a Day With Val" contest...Quinn Morgendorffer!  An AU take on the episode "The Lost Girls."
Tapped Out
8/13 Young Daria discovers a new skill in tap dancing class, and decides to find out how it will benefit her at home and at school.
When the Bough Breaks
3/14 After becoming a mother for the first time, Jodie finds herself struggling to meet the new challenges she faces.
Mission: Impawsible
4/14 The cats and dogs of Lawndale fight like... well, like cats and dogs.  But they also work hard to defend the town from its enemies.  When a strange new danger arises, can they uncover the mystery and protect the innocent before it's too late?
Out of Fashion
7/14 When the Fashion Club disbands at the end of "Fat Like Me," the consequences spread throughout all of Lawndale.  An AU story that turns the lives of Sandi, Quinn, and Stacy upside-down.
Shake, Shake, Quiver and Quake
10/14 A teenage Jake Morgendorffer struggles to survive military academy bullies, a grueling training course, and his first date to a school dance in this pre-canon story.
Shush First, Answer Questions Later
7/15 Daria's first day as a librarian doesn't go quite the way she hoped it would.
Outclassed
7/15 The breakup of the Fashion Club has some unexpected consequences for Sandi and Stacy as they begin their senior year at Lawndale High.
Mack of All Trades
7/15 Twelve-year-old Mack thinks his life is ruined when his father changes his middle name to Jordan, but his problems are only beginning.  He suffers through one humiliation after another courtesy of Shakespeare, sinkholes, and strawberries, but at last he finally realizes what's truly important.
Exorcise in Futility
7/15 Jake Morgendorffer, Anthony DeMartino, and Timothy O'Neill team up to slay their demons in a night that none of them will ever forget... no matter how hard they try.
The Children of the Scorn
12/15 It's Focus on Teens Night at the Morgendorffer house, and Daria has to stop a room full of kids from killing each other, burning the house down, or--worst of all--being forced into a sing-a-long.  An alternate-universe take on the episode "Pinch Sitter."
I'm (Not) With the Band
1/16 High schoolers Trent Lane and Jesse Moreno are ready to be big-time musicians. All they need is a big break. And a few bandmates. And a name. And some talent.
Two Under Par
12/16 When Jake Morgendorffer and Jodie Landon meet on the golf course, an unlikely friendship is born. Set during "Is It Fall Yet?"
Camped Out
12/16 What if Daria had blown off the Camp Grizzly reunion with Jane while Trent decided to stay?  An alternate universe take on the episode 'Camp Fear.'
Last of the Summer Whine
12/16 Young Tom and Elsie are in for yet another boring summer at the Cove...unless they take matters into their own hands with Operation Vacation Cancellation.
Telling Tales Out of School
5/17 David's back for another summer of tutoring in Lawndale, but only if he can ignore the gossip everyone's talking about.
No Bad Deed Goes Unrewarded
7/17 It's the final straw, and Mack has decided to give in to the darkness within.  But can Evil Mack fight his destiny?  A response to Captain Marbles's Iron Chef Challenge: Mack's Dark Side.
86 Bottles of Beer
Do I Have to Paint You a Picture?
2/10 Kevin Thompson, CONTROL Agent 86, is on the case when several famous paintings go missing.  With the help of his new partner, Agent 99, he's ready to take on whatever KAOS can throw at him--including paintballs and art supplies.  A parody of "Get Smart."
The Weed of Crime Bears Glitter Fruit
6/10 CONTROL faces a new challenge when KAOS begins drugging the population with hallucinogenic fruit.  Will Agents 86 and 99 be able to stop them with some help from a mechanical chipmunk?
All Creatures Great and Maul
1/11 CONTROL is under attack by cute little animals, but Agents 86 and 99 are ready to do whatever it takes to stop KAOS.  Even if it means singing another forty verses of "If You're Happy and You Know It."I'm (Not) With the Band
I Spy, with My Extra Eye
8/11 People have started showing up with deformed facial features, but CONTROL agents Kevin Thompson and 99 are on the case.  They'll have to prevent the next victim from going under the knife with some help from the Cashman's cosmetics section as well as backup from a most annoying source.
Hacking into the Antisocial Network
10/13 The computers at CONTROL headquarters have gone haywire thanks to a KAOS hacker.  Fortunately, Kevin Thompson and his partner, 99, are ready to take on the mysterious assailant...if they can navigate the twisted world of the Internet.
The Ted Zone
GifTed
1/16 We first met Ted in "The New Kid," but then he disappeared almost entirely from the show. Two seasons later, he got one line in a single episode that confirmed he was still attending Lawndale High. What the hell was he doing during all that time? Let's find out.
The Ted Zon
1/16 Ted goes alternative with Brittany Taylor, but soon discovers that her life may be at stake. Can he prevent a tragedy before it's too late?
Tedieval Times
7/15 Ted jumps into the school's Medieval fair with enthusiasm...but can an evening of jousting, fortune telling, and theater make him forget hisrecent brush with death?
Physical Teducation (#4)
12/15 Ted decides to make a name for himself by excelling at a sport...just as soon as he figures out which sport that might be.
PerforaTed (#5)
12/15 Ted makes a new friend and explores the exciting world of body modification.
Write Said Ted (#6)
12/15 When given a special assignment by Mr. O'Neill, Ted enters the challenging world of fiction writing.
CorrecTed Vision (#7)
12/16 When Daria shows up at school without her glasses, Ted begins to wonder if glasses might somehow be the key to his invisibility.
Ted Talks Trash (#8)
12/16 Ted's Awareness of Others Week service activity brings him unexpected joy but also lands him in an ethical dilemma.
Ted Takes a Holiday (#9)
5/17 Ted meets up with Cupid and St. Patrick's Day, but will he be able to help them convince Christmas, Halloween, and Guy Fawkes Day to return to Holiday Island?  Well...no.  Probably not.

Kristen Bealer is a writer and Daria fan from Iowa, which is about as boring as it sounds. She bears an uncanny resemblance to Future Daria from "Write Where It Hurts".


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