What's that you're really stirring in your tea? Honey, or bee vomit? Animal secretions that make us say yum, tonight, on Sick, Sad World

Lawndale High is closed for a couple days while the teachers are all at a state convention. Most of them are in it just for the meal per-diem, but Mr. O'Neill is genuinely interested in the presentations. He gets very inspired by a speaker that tells everyone about how failure is a good thing, and decides to assign his class to pick something to fail at.
Brittany tries to be unpopular, Kevin tries to be a bad athlete, Jodie tries to get her parents to let her have the summer off, Mack tries to teach Kevin about the government, Jane tries to conform, and Daria tries to get Quinn grounded so she can't go to some fashion show.
Brittany goes to Daria for advice on becoming unpopular, and ends up talking to the other cheerleaders about "the biorhythmical weapons in the rainforests of Afghanistan" and so on until they kick her off the team.
Jodie quickly fails by asking her parents for the summer off and not getting it.
Jane changes her outfit and starts sticking "like" in her speech a lot, and soon gets asked to join the cheerleading team to replace Brittany.
Mack, of course, isn't able to teach Kevin anything.
Kevin spots Mr. O'Neill at a school game, and thinks he's checking up on his homework, so he throws an interception on purpose and gets kicked off the team.
Daria tries to get Quinn grounded by getting Jake mad about her spending, but Helen says Daria has to go with Quinn to the extravaganza to keep an eye on Quinn's spending.
Pretty much the entire class is depressed over the assignment, whether they "succeeded in failing" or not. This makes Mr. O'Neill depressed.
Jane actually goes to the cheerleading tryouts, but has a vision of herself as a cheerleader and gets out quick.
Mack and Jodie manage to get Kevin and Brittany back on their respective teams. Daria and Jane go find Mr. O'Neill and get him to cheer up, but exact a price, and he ends up shadowing Quinn at the fashion extravaganza.

Mr. O'Neill: So, class, your assignment is to pick something you know you'll fail at, to prove that failing isn't the end of the world.
Daria: There goes my motivation.

Brittany: I'm... right?
Daria: It gets easier after the first time.

Jane: So, what are you going to fail at? Giving a damn?
Daria: I could fail to see the merit of this assignment.
Jane: Or succeed in finding it a waste of time.

Jane: What are you saying, I'm some kind of freak of nature?
Daria: Define of nature.

Daria: Or how people in Afghanistan are being stoned to death for wearing the wrong attire.
Sandi: You hear that Stacy?

Jane: Do you want to test out my new lip gloss? It's kiwi flavored.
Tom: Well, I guess if I kissed you at least my eyes would be closed.

Angie: I feel bad about Brittany. It's like she's lost her way.
Nikki: She does that all the time.
Angie: No, I mean like she's forgotten who she is.
Nikki: Like I said...

Mr. O'Neill: And you learned that failure isn't so bad now, is it?
Jodie: No, I learned that my parents would rather I drop dead from exhaustion than miss the opportunity to shred some bribe-taking congressman's incriminating phone bills.
Daria: At least she'll be learning a marketable skill.

Jane: They want me for the squad.
Daria: I hope you mean the kind where you get a blindfold.

"Cheer, cheer, cheer. Yell, yell, yell. Who cares who wins? We're all going to hell." -- Jane ("The F Word")

Brittany: Babe, you wouldn't believe the cheerleader who auditioned yesterday. She got scared and lost all her bouncity-bounce.
Daria: You had bouncity-bounce?
Jane: Drop it or I'll have to kill you.
Daria: I'm taking Quinn to the Fashion Extravaganza tomorrow. What makes you think I don't want you to kill me?

"I can't believe Quinn tried to pass Mr. O'Neill off as a professional fashion consultant." -- Sandi ("The F Word")

Wraith's Ramblings:
I quite enjoyed the tone of this episode, and we finally got a Classic Daria ending. Seeing more Jodie and Mack was nice, but we saw too much Kevin and Brittany. On the whole, pretty good.
Also see my Rambling of 11-10-00.