Another Damn Mary Sue Fanfic
Text ©2003 Roger E. Moore (firstname.lastname@example.org)
Feedback (good, bad, indifferent, just want to bother me, whatever) is appreciated. Please write to: email@example.com
Synopsis: The author writes a Mary Sue story for “Daria.” The cause of literature is hurled back into the Dark Ages.
Author’s Notes: The events in this story took place only in the author’s imagination. The reader is assumed to have a working knowledge of the major characters from the “Daria” series, so prolonged personal introductions are not given in the story, which would make the introductions longer than the story itself. There are no other notes, except that in the original version of this tale, I accidentally called it a “Mary Jane” fanfic. Duh.
Acknowledgements: For obvious reasons, no one was allowed to beta-read this story. I acknowledge this and am grateful for it.
INT = Interior scene
EXT = Exterior scene
VO = Voice over (off screen)
1. INT: EARLY AFTERNOON, FRONT HALL, MORGENDORFFER HOME
Daria walks into the house from the mailbox, opening an envelope addressed to her. Standing in place, she pulls out the letter and reads it. As she does, her face takes on a shocked expression. Moments later, she lowers the letter.
DARIA: [stunned] He rejected my story. [looks at letter again] And he sent me a badly photocopied form letter he didn’t even sign. [angry glare] For that . . . he must pay.
2. EXT: LATER THAT DAY, ON A HIGHWAY IN A CAR DRIVEN BY JANE LANE
JANE: [driving] Help me out here, Morgendorffer. You want to see the editor who rejected your story with a form letter, so you can . . . do what?
DARIA: [scowls] Just drive.
3. EXT: THAT AFTERNOON, OUTSIDE AN OFFICE BUILDING
DARIA: Park by the door there. Keep the engine running.
JANE: Listen, while you're inside, can you get me a soda? And some chips, any kind. And a hot dog, if the vending machines have one. Microwave it before you come out, and put on some ketchup and mustard, and if they have relish—
DARIA: Stop the damn car, already.
Daria gets out of the car once Jane stops. Daria goes into the building.
JANE: [yells out of car window at Daria] If they have chips, get the barbecue flavor!
There is a short pause.
ROGER MOORE: [VO, inside building] AAAAAAUUUGGGHHH!!!!!!
Daria runs back out of the building and jumps in the car.
DARIA: Love these boots. Home, please.
JANE: [groans, stamps on the gas, peels out of parking lot] Where’s my food? And am I gonna do this every time you get a damn form rejection letter?
DARIA: I'll pay for pizza tonight.
JANE: [defeated] Damn it, Morgendorffer, you know all my weaknesses.
They drive away.