Episode 14- "Valentines Day at Lawndale High" -January 28, 1997


(All students are gathered in the auditorium of Lawndale High with Ms. Angela Li at the podium.)

Ms. Angela Li: "As Lawndale High's principle, I have the honor of announcing to the student body that we will be holding a Valentine's Day Dance to offer entertainment for the student body as well as benefiting our school budget. The student council will accept canned food donations for admission, and encourages couples to attend at a reduced rate."

(Daria, Jane, and Jodie are sarcastically nearly jumping out of their chairs in excitement.)

Jodie: "Daria, uhh...what am I going to say. As president of the student council, Ms. Li is going to expect me to come up and say something enthusiastic for the Valentine's Day Dance?"

Daria: (with the usual sarcasm) "Oh, just go up and talk about another masochistic societal rite that is intended for only popular people's benefit."

Jane: "Or, you could just tell everyone how wonderful it will be and that they should go. Then, Brittany will probably stand up and start a cheer and the whole auditorium will break into an uproar, and they'll let everyone out for the day."

Ms. Angela Li: "At this time, could we have Miss Jodie Landon, your student council president, talk to you about the dance."

(Jodie walks up to the podium.)

Jodie: "On behalf of the student council, I would like to encourage everyone to come to the Valentine's Dance. Please bring canned food to donate to people in need so that they, too, can benefit from this wonderful activity."

(Zooms in to a picture of the football jocks and popular, along with the Fashion Club members and cheerleaders sitting in front of the stage.)

Kevin: "Yeah, uh, like that's pretty cool that we're helping like some people or whatever we're doing! Uhh, hike!"

Brittany: "Ohhh, you're soooo smart Kevin; what a great idea." (shouting above the audience) "Let's start a cheer for the Valentine's Dance!"

(Focuses on the Fashion Club and Quinn)

Sandi: "Ohh, a dance! This like means the Fashion Club is going to have to go shopping for like stylish dresses. No one better have the same dress as me, or I'll like just be sooooooo embarrassed!"

Quinn: "I'm so excited, I'll have to go shopping right away...and, hmm, who should I let take me to the dance? Let's see: Joey, Jeffy, Jamie, maybe I should just take them all."

(Everyone leaves the auditorium; the next picture is at the Morgendoffer's kitchen table.)

Quinn: "Oh, Mom, I'm going to have to get a dress, and matching shoes, and jewelry, and makeup, and a purse, yeah... and then there is the limo rental."

Helen: "That's great, Quinn. We can go shopping on my lunch break tomorrow, and maybe the firm will even donate a limo."

Quinn: "One of the really big, expensive ones with champing?"

Helen: "I'm sure it can be arranged. I'll have my assistant handle it.  What about you, Daria. What are your plans for the Valentine's Day dance?"

Quinn: (blurting in) "Oh, I'm sure Daria won't be attending the dance.  These gatherings are only for popular people with dates."

Daria: "Who said I wasn't going. Maybe I do plan on attending, maybe as a chaperone or something, I know Mrs. Manson would give me a lot of credit for psychologically analyzing social patterns at extra-curricular school functions."

Quinn: "No, Mom-you can't let Daria go. My night will be ruined!"

(Quinn runs of into her room crying.)

Helen: "Well, I think that is a good idea, Daria. Don't you Jake?"

(Jake is absorbed in the nightly paper and is startled at the sound of his name.)

Jake: "Uhmm, yeah, yeah, I agree."

(Daria goes out the door to Jane's house, and the next picture shows Daria at Jane's door. After knocking, Trent finally opens the door.)

Trent: (cough, cough) "Uh, hey, Daria. What's up?"

Daria: "Is Jane home?"

Trent: "Uh, yeah, she's upstairs. But, watch out! She's working on some plaster sculpture and it, uh, pretty dangerous."

Daria: "Thanks, Trent."

(Daria walks upstairs to Jane's room where, when she opens the door, a big blob-like sculpture looks as if it's screaming in pain.)

Jane: "Oh, hi Daria. Glad you came. I've kinda given up on this thing; it looks pretty pathetic, huh."

Daria: "It only looks pathetic if you think it does, who knows, you could have intended to make it look like a miserable object. If you don't think it's bad, no one else will either."

Jane: "Yeah, well I pride myself on my low self-esteem. So, what do you plan on doing the night of this dance. Wanna watch the Sick Sad World marathon?"

Daria: "Actually, I was planning on attending-just to make Quinn miserable. The only problem is I can't get anyone to go with me, except Upchuck, of course, who would go with anyone who had two legs."

Jane: "I'm afraid you're wrong. Remember the time he took his pet frog to Prom as his date? The only problem was, someone stepped on it while they were dancing, and they cancelled the dance because his frog died. They set aside that whole week for kids who were having problems dealing with the frog's death to talk to the school counselors?"

Daria: "Yeah, well I want to go-just because I said I was going to. The only problem is, I'm afraid that I, too, may have to resort to taking a four-legged date."

Jane: "Why don't you go with Trent? He doesn't have anything better to do all day."

Daria: "Me go with Trent? I'm sorry, but I don't want to put him through the agony of having to turn me down or be utterly embarrassed the whole night."

Jane: "Oh, Daria, I'm sure he'd go with you."

(Jane hollers down the stairs for Trent to come up, and he comes up to her room.)

Jane: "Hey, Trent, will you go to the Lawndale Valentine's Day dance with Daria-she needs someone to go with."

Trent: "Hmm, I never really attended any of those things while I was, uh, going to Lawndale."

Daria: "That's probably because you never showed up for classes."

Trent: "Sure, Daria. I'll go with you. It might be kinda fun, and all."

Daria: "OK."

(Daria quickly leaves the room and rushes out of the house as quickly as possible.)

Daria: "See you tomorrow Jane."

(The scene changes to Lawndale High, the day of the Valentines Day dance.  The Fashion Club is decorating the gym.)

Tiffany: "Oh, Sandi, I got the most beautiful dress; it's a white one with spaghetti straps-soooo trendy."

Stacy: "Wow. Well I got this pretty pink.....

(Stacy is cut off by Quinn.)

Quinn: "Pink? Pink! Oh, mi gosh. Pink is soooo last season."

Stacy: "It is? Oh no, what am I going to do?"

Sandi: "Well, apparently, Quinn knows more about fashion than do the other members. What kind of pink is it? Is it more of a pastel or roughe?"

Stacy: "It's a light pastel with a sheer skirt."

Sandi: "Oh, well than that's OK. Pastels are really coming back this season, as long as their not roughe-ey. So, like, Quinn, you're uh cousin or whatever, I heard that she's going? What are you going to do, that's embarrassing enough to get you're Fashion Club membership revoked or something like that."

Quinn: "Oh....."

(Quinn runs off.)

(The scene changes to the lawn of Lawndale High where Daria, Jane, Jodie, and Mack are sitting.)

Jodie: "So, Mack, when are you coming to pick me up tonight. The dance starts at seven, but we want to wait until later. (to Daria and Jane) What are you guys doing tonight? Are you going to stay home?"

Jane: "I'll probably sit home watching the Sick Sad World marathon while lowering my self-esteem because of the fact that I'm not popular and don't belong at events like this. As for Daria, she's going with Trent."

Jodie: "That's great Daria! I'm so excited for you. Who's Trent?"

Jane: "Trent's my musically-obsessed brother. He and Daria would make a nice couple."

Daria: "I'm simply going with him on a friend relationship to ruin Quinn's time. I can't ruin my pessimistic image of high school dating in the 90's."

(Scene changes to Daria's room where she's pacing while on the phone to Jane.)

Daria: "Jane, maybe I shouldn't go after all. You know, I don't usually go to these things and Trent would probably be a lot happier if I just let him off the hook...."

(Jane interrupts Daria)

Jane: "No, Trent wants to go. He said he'll pick you up at seven thirty-oh, Sick Sad World is starting-gotta go, bye!"

(Daria spends the next hour trying on dresses until she finally decides on a half-way decent blue dress and some high boots. Quinn leaves. Daria is worried(for the first time in her life) and is pacing upstairs. Trent rings the doorbell and Helen answers it.)

Trent: "Uh, hello, Mrs. Morgendorffer."

Helen: "Oh, hello, uh..."

Trent: "Trent"

Helen: "Yes, Trent, of course. You must be Daria's date. Dariaaaaaa, you're date is here."

(Daria throws on a coat and hurriedly tries to escape out the door without talking to her mother.)

Helen: "Oh, wait just a sec, Daria. Let me get a picture of you two lovebirds."

Daria: "Mom, would you stop using those cliche's. We're just going as acquaintances. Bye."

(Daria and Trent leave. They drive for a while and then arrive at the dance, while Trent escorts her in. Daria makes the rounds trying to embarrass Quinn as much as possible where she and Trent sit down. Trent keeps staring at Daria.)

Trent: "Uh, Daria, I'm not very good at asking this, uh, but, do you want to dance with me?"

Daria: "Oh, I don't think..."

(Trent takes Daria's hand and takes her out on the dance floor. They dance and, surprisingly, Daria is enjoying herself. Trent keeps staring at her with his kinda blank but "in love" expression. After they danced to a few songs, they decide to leave. Trent takes Daria home, but they sit in the car and talk for a while.)

Trent: "Uh, I had a really good time Daria. We should do something together again, sometime."

Daria: "Yeah, I had fun, too. Maybe we can talk later on."

(They both say their good-bye's and Daria goes inside while Trent drives off. However, at the end the episode leaves the audience in anticipation of what will happen next with Daria and Trent while they both have dazed and "in love" expressions on their faces.)