The king of the jungle was one tubby tabby... until the animal plastic surgeon came to call. Lipo for Leo, next on Sick, Sad World.

The Fashion Club is watching the Fashionvision Humanitarian Awards, which gives them the idea to their own good works. They decide to replace the mirror in the girl's bathroom at school, which adds at least 2 pounds.
Helen gets freaked out by a phone call with Rita that involves Erin and why she doesn't love the guy she married. Helen barges into Daria's room expecting to find Daria and Tom, but Tom isn't there and Helen retreats. Right after she leaves Jane calls up Daria, asking her where the hell she is. Daria's late for their movie date, and they get stuck watching some cheesy B-movie instead of the Croatian comedy they had planned to. After the movie Jane bugs Daria to find out what she was doing, and Daria finally admits that she was working on a short story for publication. Jane doesn't really like the story, but she manages to convince Daria to let Tom read it.
Daria sort of tells Jake about the story, and he starts out supportive but quickly segues into a Corporal Ellenbogen rant involving showtunes.
To raise money for their mirror, the Fashion Club decides to start a fashion newsletter. Each of the Fashion Club members writes an article for "Fashion Club Forecast." No one at school is really interested, but the girls manage to convince a number of guys to buy them anyway.
Tom loves Daria's story and manages to convince her to submit it for publication. All the time he's in her room Helen keeps making excuses to barge in, checking up on them. Daria ends up sending her story off to the magazine Tom mentioned, Musings. Unfortunately, she runs into Mr. O'Neill at the post office, and he figures out what she's doing.
At school soon after this, Mr. O'Neill lets slip that Daria's trying to publish a story in Musings. Jodie and Ms. Barch are supportive, but Daria isn't happy that the news is out.
Jake tries to get Daria to listen to his showtune, but Daria is distracted by the cries of dismay from downstairs. The Fashion Club has just received their new issue of Waif, and has discovered that all of their predictions were wrong.
Daria finds a letter from Musings among the mail, and it turns out to be a rejection letter. Daria goes over to Tom's to complain at him. Tom tries to be supportive, but Daria gets pissed and picks a fight, then walks off.
The Fashion Club, in an attempt to salvage their reputation, buys back all their newsletters. They find out at the same time that no-one actually read it. They end up simply putting up a plaque to commemorate putting up the plaque.
Jake finally gets Daria to listen to his song, and it isn't very good. Daria gives him a pep talk about trying and realizes she's been a jerk. She calls Tom and offers to apologize, so he comes over. Helen starts her recent interruption routine, and Daria and Tom talk around her visits. Tom gives Daria some encouragement, and Helen barges in just as they kiss.

"Mu-ohm! I'm not J. Edgar Winter!" -- Quinn ("The Story of D")

"You're willing to have it published and read by strangers, but you don't want your best friend to see it?" -- Jane ("The Story of D")

"Ew! Look how dirty those sheep are. From now on I buy only imported sweaters." -- Quinn ("Camp Fear")

Daria: I couldn't show it to him. It's too intimate.
Jane: Daria, it's about a flesh eating virus. How is that intimate?

Quinn: Why don't we do what we do best?
Sandi: Quinn, no one is going to pay us to eat carrot sticks.

"If it weren't for Ellenbogen I might be a Broadway lyricist. I could write songs for Cats. I could write songs for dogs!" -- Jake ("The Story of D")

"I'd like to thank my family, my friends, and not that damn Corporal Ellenbogen, or Gilbert, or Sullivan." -- Jake ("The Story of D")

Jane: Was I being enthusiastic again? I'm sorry.
Daria: You didn't mean anything by it.

Jodie: You know, my mother gets Musings and their fiction is awful. I bet you'll have no trouble getting in.
Daria: Gee, thanks.

Daria: Ever have one of those moments that no shower, no matter the duration nor the temperature, can ever erase?
Jane: I'm leaning towards trauma induced amnesia myself. Punch my head, would ya?

"What do you think this stuff is that looks like vomit?" -- Stacy ("The Story of D")

Wraith's Ramblings:
We've seen most of the main plot before, but the subplot is amusing.
Also see my Rambling of 03-25-2001